Top 10 Things Learned This Week – The May 22nd Buck Woody / Portland Edition
- Some developers have decent artistic skills, particularly when drawing plums with crayons. Even when those plums look like apples.
- I saw a Hipster get hit by a car while jaywalking. Well, actually he/she walked into the side of the moving car and bounced off of it. Surprisingly more force is required to knock someone out of their yellow low-rise jeans, yet I do believe I saw his/her blue hair quiver ever so gently from the trauma. The trick is to swerve *into* the hipster folks.
- Buck Woody has at least once uttered the phrase “I don’t know what to say.” I was there and can confirm it happened.
- If you leave me unatteded for 30 minutes invariably, some part of me will end up tattooed.
- I’ve been officially appointed as Buck’s Tweet Monkey. Tweet Monkey do good – Tweet Monkey get reward. Reward was stress sumo. Tweet Monkey wanted Quest Flashlight. Tweet Monkey sad now.
- The projectors shut down at 5:20pm on Saturdays at the University of Portland. Apparently the high-ons in the A/V department did not adjust for Daylight Savings Time.
- You can get pulled over doing 140 mph and get away with only doing 5 over the limit… if you’re Buck Woody.
- Don’t show up late to a session led by Buck Woody. Particularly if you’re older. Or wear funny hats. Or look like a Vietnam Veteran. Or are human. You be asked to sit in the front row and become a prop for the speaker. You will be Session Monkey.
- Someone meeting Buck Woody for the first time and spending a few hours with him over dinner may make the comment: ‘Could you imagine what he would be like if he drank?”
- They hang crucifixes in the classrooms to ward off Developers. It doesn’t work.